What Does Outgrowing a Relationship Look Like?
Relationships are a learning curve. Whether you have a strong relationship with a partner, a friend, or a family member, they always teach us something. They help us grow and become the person we need to be.
Relationships can also be very long-lasting. You can have friendships that have seen you through the decades or relationships that have gone on for the most important years of your life. Naturally, after long periods of time, we change as people, become more complex, and have different interests or hobbies.
As a result, it can be natural for you to outgrow people, situations, and relationships. We offer support for you around these life transitions. So, what does this mean, and how can you tell if you have outgrown a relationship?
What Does It Mean To Outgrow A Relationship?
If you have outgrown a relationship, you may feel that you don’t connect with that person anymore. This could be mentally, socially, or physically. They may no longer seem like a good fit for you or a good match.
This could be due to differences of opinion, morals, interests, or beliefs. While you may have shared some common ground in the past, as we grow and change as individuals, the relationship may not have anything to offer you or may hold you back or prevent you from progressing in life.
If you have outgrown a relationship, you may no longer feel interested or involved with them as you change and grow older. It’s the same as outgrowing your old clothes and toys as a child or outgrowing your high school friends.
Signs You’ve Outgrown Your Relationship
Recent studies show that those who are unhappy in their relationships often stick around for their partner’s sake, hoping things will improve or change. If you feel stuck within your relationship and want to move on but feel this would hurt them, it could be a case that you’ve simply outgrown them.
Some signs that you may have outgrown your relationship are:
You have different goals in life.
You want different things.
You are moving in different directions.
Unhealthy relationship patterns.
There are more bad days than good days.
You feel the relationship is codependent.
You feel drained around them or held back.
You ignore red flags because you’ve been in a relationship for so long.
You feel disappointed by them.
You are no longer interested in the activities/hobbies you used to share.
Your feelings/morals/interests no longer align
What To Do
If you feel like you’ve outgrown your relationship, it’s important not to feel guilty about it. It happens and is a natural part of life as we grow up and change. Sometimes, your motivation changes and your needs and desires change. It could be a simple case of your partner wanting to settle down, get married and have children, whereas you would prefer to focus on furthering your career, friendships, and social life. That is perfectly okay. We’re here to help you navigate these changes.
If you feel that you no longer match up, then it is important that you communicate this to your partner, as you do not want to feel held back or stuck in a relationship where your needs and wants are not fulfilled. It’s important not just to please people and release them from friendships and relationships if it does not fulfill or better your life. Life is too short to spend with people who do not positively impact your life.
Do what is right for you and best for your mental health and wellbeing. Instead of feeling guilty, look forward and think of the things you will now be able to do without feeling restrained or restricted. If you need help unpacking your feelings, reach out to us so that we can assess where you’ve been and how you’d like to shape your future.
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